That Time My Husband Asked Me If I Was In the Middle of a Book...

So, my husband asks, "Are you in the middle of a book?" at dinner the other night. I'm pretty sure he was trying to gauge whether he'd be able to get back to playing Destiny or if I was going to call family time. I just stared at him because, I mean, what kind of question is that? When am I not in the middle of a book? He should know this by now. The rest of our conversation goes like this:

I give him the look that tells him what I've been thinking and respond, "Yes. Well...technically, I'm 80% in, so...closer to the end than the middle. Why?"

"Just wondering." And he goes back to eating his dinner. Subject dropped.

"Seriously, why?" I ask because he rarely makes such a query.

"Seriously, no reason."

But I didn't want to let it drop. I don't know why. Maybe because I'd just recently had a conversation with my younger sister about just this thing: how he always wants to talk about his hobby (hunting) and get me interested in it, but he hardly ever extends the same courtesy. Any time I say "book" or "reading" I can almost literally see his mind's eye lose focus. I understand...his hobby of choice does that to me sometimes, too, but that's why we should make the effort, right? I mean, it's fine to have your own thing. I love having reading as my own thing.

But sometimes, I want to talk bookish stuff with someone face-to-face. I don't really have anyone in my real life who's as gaga for books as I am. My older sister reads a lot of fantasy and comes to me for recommendations, but she lives over three hours away, so talking about those books becomes an online thing, not IRL. My younger sister enjoys reading, too, but she's busy and reads much slower than I do, so it's literally months before she's able to discuss a book with me. Which is a shame because we work together and I see her face on the daily and could talk to it all the time about books. I understand, though, I really do. And my other friends are all busy adulting or whatever, and if by chance they do read, it's erotica or memoirs or something else I'm not interested in.

And that's why I've always been glad to have this community. Maybe I can't see all of your beautiful faces, but at least I can have honest, gushy conversations with you all about books that I love, too. When I come out of my shell. I am such an introvert, you guys. I still feel like the new kid here, even though I've been blogging for just shy of four years. It's seriously so hard for me to insert myself in a conversation on Twitter, too. I've had a Twitter handle since 2009, before I even started blogging, and yet I only just reached 10k tweets. I have moments where I forget myself and have a nice chat with someone -- wine is usually involved -- but those instances are far and few between. Even so, I'm grateful for each and every one of you who does take the time to talk to me, despite my awkward. I wouldn't still be here if it weren't for you.

Well...and April. I've considered quitting blogging more than once but hardly at all now that April is here. She just has such an awesome approach to blogging: no stress, she posts what she wants, and she doesn't get wrapped up in all of the drama. I never comment on that stuff, but it weighs me down nonetheless. Not April. It's not that she doesn't care; she just lets it slide right off of her. I aspire to be more like April. Her family always, always comes first. (Not that mine doesn't -- I'm going to Disney World instead of BEA, for crying out loud -- but I'll freely admit that when in the middle of a good book, I would much rather finish that than spend my time in some of the ways that my family has imagined for me.) She has never shown me one ounce, not one iota of ARC envy. And she never lets a "reading schedule" stress her out. It just is what it is with her.

I strive to be more like that. And I'm getting better at it, under April's tutelage. It's just so wonderful to still have people like her in the community, ya know? Especially with the way things have been recently.

There wasn't really a point to this post. It's just that my husband got me thinking the other night, as has so much of the drama in the community as of late, and basically I just wanted to say that I still love being a part of this group. I haven't been around as much as I'd like, haven't been leaving comments, like, AT ALL in the last few months, but if we're friends and I follow your blog, know that I'm reading all of your content. I just haven't had much time to actually respond to all of your wonderful posts, what with being a full-time working mom and trying to maintain our blog here, plus get some reading done in between.

But I need you guys. My husband's been making more of an effort ever since that conversation, but he just does not get my enthusiasm for books like y'all do. That's probably true for a lot of us, and that's why we're all here, right?

So...anyone read any good books lately? =)

Labels: blogging community, co-blogging, discussion